Sixes & Sevens
by Lady Dudley
Summary: CAUTION: Contains spoilers. My theory on Molly's thoughts/feelings during season 3. *FINAL CHAPTER ADDED*
1. Chapter 1

**CAUTION: Contains spoilers for S3E1.**

**A/N: Just a short drabble of what I think Molly might be thinking/feeling after "The Empty Hearse." Hope you like :)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Dedication: for lais89 after all the wonderful encouragement to still keep writing Sherlolly x**

_**Sixes & Sevens**_

…_  
Fair moon, to thee I sing,  
Bright regent of the heavens,  
Say, why is everything  
Either at sixes or at sevens?  
Fair moon, to thee I sing,  
Bright regent of the heavens  
-_'Fair Moon, To Thee I Sing,' HMS Pinafore (Gilbert & Sullivan)  
_…_

_"You really thought he was the one, didn't you? The love of your life."_

"_Because the one person he thought didn't matter at all to me, was the one person that mattered the most."_

_"I hope you'll be very happy, Molly Hooper. You deserve it."_

_"You made it all possible. But you can't do this again, can you?"_

"_I've moved on."_

Snippets of conversations from the last couple of days flittered through Molly's mind as she lay in bed, staring into the darkness and absently fiddling with her engagement ring. After drinks at 221B she'd told Tom that she needed a bit of space to process everything and he'd generously given her the time she needed.

Just like that, without any suspicion of her inner turmoil.

But that was just how they were: _everything_ with Tom was easy and sweet. When he had proposed, only a few weeks before, it had just seemed to make sense.

Then Sherlock had returned and suddenly nothing made sense any more.

She knew that he'd seen the ring the moment she took her gloves off, but the look on his face when he finally brought it up had broken her heart.

She'd thought that she was over him, that when he returned it wouldn't matter because she would just be his pathologist. Nothing more.

She wasn't expecting him to _thank_ her, to _kiss_ her and to tell her that she mattered (most, he'd actually said _most_) and that he wanted her to be happy.

And he had meant it.

No jokes, no belittling of his (or her) feelings, just a sincere expression of his gratitude and a hint of something more.

And it was the hint, more than anything, which had affected her.

A small part of her screamed that he had no _right_ to come back into her life and tell her those things. Not now, maybe not ever.

But another part, the bigger part, wondered what she was going to do with that information.

She was positive that he hadn't meant to give so much away; that he was wasn't trying to influence her. In fact, he seemed to believe that all of his influence over her had gone.

But it wasn't, how could it be?

He was the great consulting detective, _her_ great consulting detective, how could he not see that a part of her would always belong to him?

Molly's eyes filled with tears as she remembered that bittersweet moment when he'd kissed her cheek and wished her well.

He wanted her to be happy, but how could he think that she would ever be happy knowing that he wasn't?

How could she be happy without him?

Molly bit her lip at the treacherous thought and rolled onto her side, wondering if the timing of his return was the universe trying to tell her something.

She loved Tom, she really did and he loved her. And yet…she loved Sherlock more and it was just possible that he might love her too.

She bit back a sob; what was she going to do now?

...

**A/N: I have left it sort of open at the end as I might continue this as the series progresses :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: First off, thank you for all the reviews/favourites for this story - I'm so glad you enjoyed it :) Here is a little something on Molly's thoughts following TSoT. Hope you like! :)**

…  
_You could sustain or are you comfortable with the pain?  
You've got no one to blame for your unhappiness  
You got yourself into your own mess  
Lettin' your worries pass you by  
Don't you think it's worth your time  
To change your mind?  
_-'Hold On'  
…

"_You just left," Molly said, her tone a mixture of hurt and reproach._

_Sherlock didn't quite meet her eye, "I couldn't stand it anymore."_

_Molly felt her breath hitch, "Stand what?"_

Molly shook herself out of her daydream before Sherlock could answer, she wasn't sure what answer she wanted him to give anyway:

"_I couldn't stand everyone being so happy."_

"_I couldn't stand seeing you with Tom."_

"_I couldn't stand seeing _her_ dancing with someone else."_

Even in her own mind, Molly couldn't quite bring herself to use Janine's name; much to her annoyance and shame, she'd been jealous of the bridesmaid ever since she'd laid eyes on her.

Jealous that she was partnered with Sherlock, jealous that she could freely speak to him whenever she wanted, jealous that…well, the list went on.

She'd spent a miserable day pretending to be happy with Tom - possibly overdoing it in the process (and when had it become so _hard_ to be happy with him anyway?) - and trying _not_ to watch the pair too closely.

Then he'd just left the reception.

Looking so lost and sad that it had physically hurt her to be unable to go after him, to comfort him somehow.

She wasn't in the mood for partying after that and had only stayed on the dance floor until the song had ended before she'd returned to her seat. Silently cursing herself for not looking out for him or following him when he'd gone.

And then cursing herself for thinking things like that with her fiancé sitting right next to her.

That was when she'd realised how much trouble she was in.

Things were different now that Sherlock was back and it was only too clear that her feelings for him hadn't changed. But now it wasn't just a question of what she felt, there was also Tom to consider: could she really sacrifice her present for a future that might never happen?

Would Sherlock even want her if she did?

On the other hand, would it be fair to anyone involved for her to marry a man when her heart and affections were engaged elsewhere?

Molly sighed heavily, perhaps she really was doomed to be an old cat lady after all.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I apologise for the delay in updating - but the last few days have been a little crazy and we just had high temperatures all last week (44**°**C during the day and 30**°**C at night). Anyways, I hope you enjoy this (last) chapter. I am trying to keep this as canon as possible, so this is my theory for why we don't see her visiting Sherlock. I am gearing up for a third story to round off this and 'I Still Need You' though, so watch this space :) Thanks for all the reviews/favourites/follows! xx  
**

…  
_Don't know when I've been so blue  
Don't know what's come over you  
You've found someone new  
And don't it make my brown eyes blue  
I'll be fine when you're gone  
I'll just cry all night long, say it isn't true  
And don't it make my brown eyes blue_  
-'Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue?' Crystal Gayle  
…

Molly hadn't wanted to believe it, but then nothing had gone the way she planned lately.

She'd finally broken it off with Tom and the next time she'd seen Sherlock he'd been high. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been so angry.

So she'd slapped him.

Three times.

Once for him, once for her and once for everything he'd thrown away.

Then she'd heard that he'd been shot.

She hadn't thought about anything then, it had all been forgiven and forgotten in that horrible moment when she thought she'd lost him. Lost him without ever once telling him that she loved him.

She'd used her lunchbreak to rush over to the hospital, desperate to see him and to assure herself that he was all right.

But she'd been too late.

_She_ had been there.

The bridesmaid.

The one she'd spent the whole of John's wedding day resenting; the one who'd eventually spurned her into action in order not to lose him.

She was talking to him with easy familiarity, she even kissed his cheek before she left.

Molly hadn't been able to face him after that.

She was too hurt, too angry and too ashamed for that.

She had loved him all this time, had even broken off her engagement for him and…for what? He'd never asked her to do that for him and now it was only too clear why.

He didn't love her.

She'd been living in a dream to even imagine that she might have finally – _finally_ – had an iota of hope.

Seeing the newspaper headlines as she left the hospital had been the last straw.

She cried all the way back to work.


End file.
